Today is Mother’s Day in Guatemala. May 10th is always the date to celebrate Mother’s Day so to all you mom’s and future moms and those who are being a mom to others we celebrate motherhood with you today. Moms and women in general help give us a different perspective on life. I heard a story of a little girl who came to her mom and asked her how human beings came into existence. The mom explained the Genesis account how God created man and then created woman out of the side of man. Later the little girl went to her dad and asked him the same question. Her dad replied that we are the product of evolutionary change and that we came from monkeys. The girl was a bit confused with the two different accounts so she went back to her mom and explained her confusion. Her mom was quick to give an answer. She said “Well that is very easy to resolve. Your dad was explaining where his side of the family came from and I was explaining where my side came from.” My life has been blessed with a wise and godly mom who has impacted my life. Mom has always been the glue that held our family together. My dad was not the spiritual head of our family, he never took an interest in this area but my mom always made sure we were in church when she was not able to attend because she worked nights at the hospital. If she could not attend in the morning she went to the service at night and many times I would go with her. She sacrificed so much for my 5 brothers and sisters and I have a debt of gratitude to her and to the Lord for all she has meant to me and done for me through the years. I pray that each person here tonight is able to say the same thing but the reality is that many people are growing up in dysfunctional, parentless families that are producing children who are facing great challenges and are suffering. The greatest gift any child can receive is a loving home that has both a loving mother and father who love the Lord and make Him the priority of their life. The disintegration of any society can be traced to the disintegration of the family. Unhealthy families produce unhealthy children and unless the Lord intervenes by His grace and bring salvation and healing, life for the parents and children will never be what God intended it to be.
The Bible is filled with many godly women who are examples to all of us. Tonight I want to look at the life of one extraordinary woman named Abigail who lived a very challenging life but had God’s wisdom to respond to a life threatening situation that would have had dire consequences for many people. (1 Samuel 25:2-42)
*Abigail’s name means “source of joy.” She was a woman that her husband should have been proud of because she was a person of good understanding and was beautiful in appearance. Her husband on the other hand was quite the opposite. His name, Nabal, means “fool.” Why would a parent name her child “fool?” Seems quite cruel to me to grow up being called a fool all the time. His name was prophetic as we read in this story. Nabal was a very rich businessman but lacked common sense. He knew how to make himself wealthy but was horrible in relational skills as he was harsh (stubborn, severe, rough, rude) and evil in his actions toward others. It seemed like Abigail and Nabal were the odd couple and my heart goes out to her to be married to a man like Nabal. One commentator called it “Beauty and the Beast.” I don’t see Nabal as a very sensitive man, pretty rough and selfish and cared more for his possessions than people. We have seen a lot of Nabals in the news lately. Men who placed more value on possessions than people. The collapse of the USA economy can be traced to a great degree on the greediness of man who seeks to gain wealth at the expense of someone else. Many of the financial transactions did not have the best interest of the investors but were deceitful get rich quick schemes for the company or manager of the funds. Foolish actions on their part have devastated many families and businesses.
*David and his men are living near Nabal as he continues to flee from Saul’s insane pursuit of his life. David was at this time in his life dependent on help from others to sustain his life and the lives of his men. When David discovered that Nabal’s workers were shearing sheep in Carmel he sent 10 of his men to ask for help, a donation of food as compensation for the protection David and his men had given to Nabal’s workers and his animals. Nabal would have nothing to do with David or his men. In spite of the services David had given to Nabal there was no gratitude given to David. Nabal had plenty of sheep and goats to give and it would not have made a dent in his bank account but he refused to help. His response indicates how selfish he was. “Shall I then take my bread and my water and my meat that I have killed for my shearers, and give it to men when I do not know where they are from? (25:11) Nabal was full of himself and thought only of himself. He had no compassion for David and his men nor the situation they were facing on a daily basis.
Not only did he refuse offer help, he mocked David and called him a rebellious runaway servant! David had made a kind appeal to Nabal, demanding nothing from him but he was rejected and treated poorly. Had Nabal truly believed that David would be the next king of Israel perhaps he would have responded differently. In our own lives we can often make the same mistake. We respond to people as we view them now with little thought of what they will become. We can easily misjudge or prejudge someone and later regret what we did or thought. I read a story recently that is a great example of this.
A seminary professor was vacationing with his wife in Gatlinburg , TN. One morning, they were eating breakfast at a little restaurant, hoping to enjoy a quiet, family meal. While they were waiting for their food, they noticed a distinguished looking, white-haired man moving from table to table, visiting with the guests. The professor leaned over and whispered to his wife, 'I hope he doesn't come over here.' But sure enough, the man did come over to their table.
'Where are you folks from?' he asked in a friendly voice.
' Oklahoma ,' they answered.
'Great to have you here in Tennessee ,' the stranger said.. 'What do you do for a living?'
'I teach at a seminary,' he replied.
'Oh, so you teach preachers how to preach, do you? Well, I've got a really great story for you.' And with that, the gentleman pulled up a chair and sat down at the table with the couple.
The professor groaned and thought to himself, 'Great...Just what I need...another preacher story!'
The man started, 'See that mountain over there? (pointing out the restaurant window). Not far from the base of that mountain, there was a boy born to an unwed mother. He had a hard time growing up, because every place he went, he was always asked the same question, 'Hey boy, Who's your daddy?' Whether he was at school, in the grocery store or drug store, people would ask the same question, 'Who's your daddy?'
He would hide at recess and lunch time from other students. He would avoid going in to stores because that question hurt him so bad. 'When he was about 12 years old, a new preacher came to his church. He would always go in late and slip out early to avoid hearing the question, 'Who's your daddy?'
But one day, the new preacher said the benediction so fast that he got caught and had to walk out with the crowd.
Just about the time he got to the back door, the new preacher, not knowing anything about him, put his hand on his shoulder and asked him, 'Son, who's your daddy?'
The whole church got deathly quiet. He could feel every eye in the church looking at him Now everyone would finally know the answer to the question, 'Who's your daddy?'
'This new preacher, though, sensed the situation around him and using discernment that only the Holy Spirit could give, said the following to that scared little boy.. 'Wait a minute! I know who you are! I see the family resemblance now, You are a child of God.'
With that he patted the boy on his shoulder and said, 'Boy, you've got a great inheritance. Go and claim it.'
'With that, the boy smiled for the first time in a long time and walked out the door a changed person. He was never the same again. Whenever anybody asked him, 'Who's your Daddy?' he'd just tell them, 'I'm a Child of God..''
The distinguished gentleman got up from the table and said, 'Isn't that a great story?'
The professor responded that it really was a great story!
As the man turned to leave, he said, 'You know, if that new preacher hadn't told me that I was one of God's children, I probably never would have amounted to anything!' And he walked away..
The seminary professor and his wife were stunned. He called the waitress over & asked her, 'Do you know who that man was -- the one who just left that was sitting at our table?'
The waitress grinned and said, 'Of course. Everybody here knows him. That's Ben Hooper. He's governor of Tennessee !'
Nabal either did not know much about David or he did not care as evidenced in his offensive response to David’s request.
*When David received word of Nabal’s response he went ballistic. David definitely was responding in his flesh. His anger rose quickly and he made a rash decision. Nabal and David were both wrong in their actions and reactions. A massive amount of bloodshed was in the making as David took great offense at what Nabal had said and done. David was prepared to take things into his own hands, execute his own decision without consulting God or the prophets. Many of us can relate to David’s response. When we are offended we take up the offense and immediately begin to plan and plot our revenge attack. “If this is the kind of respect I get then I will show this person a thing or two!” When we respond in anger we always make wrong decisions and say things that do more damage than good. David’s humanity is very evident in this situation and he is headed for big trouble unless something happens.
*Praise God for Abigail! She is the only person in the story who has a sound mind and the intelligence to make wise decisions. Men seem to get bent out of shape about certain things but it seems that when respect and reputation are threatened a special stupidity can come over them and lead them into doing things that are counterproductive. Abigail recognized what was happening and she immediately took action to prevent an escalation of anger and poor decisions. Nabal would have done well to consult his wife before making his decision to refuse to help David. She could have given him wise counsel and Nabal would have been blessed by following it. All of us men need to learn from this story how valuable the advice of a wife, mom and woman can be. If we discredit them or don’t even seek their counsel we only hurt ourselves.
Abigail immediately takes action to stop the impending bloodshed. She is not just thinking about herself but is thinking of her husband and the lives of workers who will die in the battle. She is also thinking about the future of David whom she acknowledges as the next King of Israel. David was prepared to shed innocent blood to avenge his name and reputation. David had premeditated murder on his mind. If he was to follow through with his decision there would be serious and lifelong consequences. One of the 7 sins Solomon listed that God hates is the shedding of innocent blood. God’s wrath would have been on David and he would have reaped many problems for what he was about to do. Praise God for people like Abigail who can see the results of our wrong intended actions and take steps to prevent us from doing stupid things. She loads up food to bring to David perhaps as a peace offering and a sign of her sincerity and apology for the actions of her husband. When David meets her she immediately bows to the ground in humility and respect for David. She intercedes for her husband’s stupidity and is willing to take the blame for him. She pleads for forgiveness and acceptance of the offering she has brought to spare the lives of the men as well as the future grief David would experience. Abigail saw a bright future for David, she knew that God would take care of his enemies because his hand was on David’s life. Praise God for people who can see beyond the present circumstances and can look to the future and see how our present actions will undermine what God has planned for our lives. Mom’s are good at doing that, they can see or sense things that will happen if we continue on the path we have chosen or are in the process of choosing. If it is not the right path, they seem to know it and God uses them to stop us from making bad decisions.
*Abigail’s actions and words strike the heart of David and he realizes that she has been sent by God. She was truly God’s messenger of the moment and David had enough sense about him to realize what was happening. He did not blow off her advice but embraced it and responded properly. David treated her with respect and listened to her advice and in doing so spared himself and his men from grave problems. All too often men have a difficult time listening to and heeding the advice of women be it a mom, spouse or friend. Many of us have grown up in cultures where women have not been viewed as equals. In the Latino culture it is very evident that men are dominant and in many situations dictatorial. This is changing and it needs to change in order for both men and women to develop their potential and benefit from all the wonderful gifts God has placed in both males and females.
When David listened and left the situation in God’s hand, God took care of it for him. Nabal after sobering up from his big party heard what Abigail had done to spare his life. He had what seems to be a heart attack and 10 days later he was dead. David was vindicated and more importantly spared from taking actions that were not pleasing to the Lord. Rather than take offense we need to give it over to God and let him take up our cause and bring revenge in the way he wants to do it.
*After Nabal’s death, David took Abigail as his wife. David received a very valuable gift to him in many ways. She became the mother of Chileab whose name means, “restraint of his father.” David’s son was a constant reminder to him of the restraint that was placed upon him through Abigail that spared him from many problems.
*Abigail is an example for us today and we can benefit greatly if we model her example. She had great understanding and was willing to step forward to make an appeal that changed the course of history for many people. She could have done nothing thinking that it was not her role or thinking that no one would listen to her. Instead she took action to do what she knew had to be done to turn a bad situation around. When you see things that are not right and you have understanding of what can happen, you have to take action. It is quite likely that no one else is going to do anything about it. Last week they showed a video of a man who defended a woman who was being robbed and as a result was stabbed. He collapsed on the sidewalk and lay there for 1 hour and 20 minutes before anyone did anything to help him and by that time it was too late, he was dead. Many had understanding of the need but no one took action, thinking someone else was going to do something. It is not safe to assume that anyone will do anything in a given situation. With awareness and knowledge comes responsibility to act and do what you can do to resolve a situation or at least get the help needed sent to the people.
The way she presented herself was in humility and because of her humility her advice was received, respected and followed. She did not use the brash know it all, get in your face and shake your finger approach that is all too often used by people to make their point when they feel strongly or feel they will not be heard. Proverbs 15:1 says “a soft answer turns away wrath.” There is something disarming that happens when we take a humble and gentle approach to resolve situations that can turn ballistic. She knew how to approach a man intent on murder and God honored her and David listened to her.
Abigail appealed for mercy and forgiveness for her husband. Even though her husband was an evil man she still appealed for mercy for him. How easy it is for us to want to see people reap what they have sown especially when they have done something evil to us. She loved mercy and made a strong appeal for it with a willingness to suffer the penalty herself. Abigail was fulfilling what we read in Micah 6:8 “He has shown you, O man, what is good; And what does the Lord require of you But to do justly, To love mercy, And to walk humbly with your God?”
Abigail was able to see the future ramifications of a bad decision and she was not willing to let it happen without first intervening. She became the voice of reason, common sense and the voice of God to a man who was enraged and was not thinking correctly. In her appeal to David she pointed out the great future that God had for him and how this decision he was making would be a hindrance to him. We have to be intelligent enough to see what people will reap if they sow bad seeds of bad decisions and use it to appeal to them. Anger and emotion blind us and keep us from seeing the consequences of our actions. Many foolish decisions would be dropped if people really understood what they would be forfeiting in the future. All of us can probably name several decisions we made that did not consider the future ramifications and the losses we would experience. One of the most important decisions you will ever make is your choice of a marriage partner. It is not a choice that should be made quickly and definitely not one that should be made without consulting the advice of trusted people who can see beyond your emotionally clouded mindset and help you see future ramifications of your potential choice. Major decisions must have strong confirmations and choosing a marriage partner is one of them.
God rewarded Abigail by placing her under the care of David after the death of her husband. Her willingness to risk all made a huge impression on David and God rewarded her as well. God takes note of our actions of intervention to help others and he will reward us for them. The reward may come in some form while we are on earth but more importantly we will be rewarded in heaven. Paul admonished the Corinthian church, “Do not get weary of doing good works because in due time you will be rewarded.” (Gal. 6:9))
Abigail was an amazing woman and though little was recorded about her life after this event she played a very important role in the life of David. Women have tremendous power of influence they can use for evil or good. I pray tonight the each of us will remember her character and her actions and let them be a model to each one of us.
